5 Realisation from My First Solo Trip
Self discovery, serendipity, and startup lessons
I have told myself a couple of times that I would want to do solo traveling, at least once in my life. The proposition of “self-discovering” yourself through the solitude of a solo trip seems enticing to me. But deep down, really, I was just up for another challenge. So this year, I gave myself an early birthday gift and packed my bags for Taipei.
I was really nervous, surprisingly. I have traveled extensively for the past years, and I have planned most of those trips. I also moved to the UK alone in 2019 and went to Taiwan once in 2017. Essentially, there is nothing to be afraid of. But still…
What if I hate being alone? What if my phone died? What if I met bad people? What if I got lost? What if I couldn’t make friends?
Oh well, none of those scary thoughts came true. I came back from the solo trip safely, alive, and breathing. I had a blast — enjoying my own company, meeting new friends, and making small talk with random strangers. Oh, not forgetting, I also lost my locker key, took the wrong train and got fined, while regretting my small stomach capacity to eat more.
Learning to be alone, but not lonely
With everything in life, I think it is important to know how to be alone but not lonely. Each of us is on our own journey, and we can’t expect someone else to understand us at all times. Sometimes, life is really about how you make peace with yourself.
The moment I landed in Taipei on day 1, my nervousness peaked. Logically, I knew nothing could go wrong on my first day. I know how to navigate with public transport and Google Maps, and I had researched the location in advance. But before reaching the hostel, I was worried about tons of stuff that I knew wouldn’t happen.
Everything went smoothly on day 1 (thankfully fyuuh!). When we are alone, our thoughts tend to run wilder than usual. I think this is why some people are not comfortable being alone. But maybe, our thoughts are just too excited to finally get our attention. I was alone but not lonely; I was giving myself full attention.
Plan, pivot, and enjoy
I have never been a planner type. My travel itinerary consists only of two things — cities and accommodation. This solo trip pushed me even further because I didn’t have to explain to anyone when I changed my mind. I modified my planned trips pretty much a few hours before leaving the hostel in the morning. I decided to visit a different museum because someone I met during a walking tour recommended it. I made a “slight” change in plan because I thought a city I passed by on my train ride to Hualien was stunning. I didn’t regret any of those spontaneous actions.
I guess running a startup is the same. Or anything in life, in fact. We can plan the best, but we need to be ready to pivot. I have been living my life with this mantra:
Nothing ever goes exactly to plan
Perfection is the enemy of progress. We need a plan, but we also need to pivot when the time comes. If we wait for the perfect timing to come, we might never make any progress. So, don’t forget to pivot, progress, and enjoy.
Serendipity is real
Serendipity by definition from Cambridge Dictionary, is the fact of finding interesting or valuable things by chance. We just never know what would happen when we try and explore. We just never know when a random act of kindness could happen to us.
Throughout this trip, I made friends with a few fellow solo-ers and met a few random strangers. One made a spontaneous trip to Bali the day after I promoted it (of course, duh). This lady even gifted me her newly bought winter coat when I badly needed it. Another one I met asked me if there is electricity in Indonesia because he only knows tempeh. I am proud to announce that I have educated one additional individual that Indonesia is very much a proper country with one of the most vibrant startup communities ;)
Serendipity in life is quite a mystery. It is something you definitely can’t plan. And it is something you just have to continue being kind because you don’t know when your kindness will make a difference in someone’s life.
Slow down and you will see more
Traveling solo heightened my senses and made me more attuned to the world around me. Without the conversations commonly done during traveling with friends, I found myself noticing the small details that I might have overlooked otherwise. I enjoyed looking at temple architecture for a good 20 minutes — fascinated by the apparent storytelling embedded in the building. I noticed more of what people are wearing on the train ride — Taiwanese definitely win the award for the most warm-fashion-outfit. I also noticed that I met a group of Filipino ladies three times at three different scenic spots at three different days — so I started talking to them because the third time is the charm.
We tend to get overwhelmed with our day-to-day activities. We hustle, we run, and we keep ourselves busy. Our culture discredits idleness because it is unproductive. But slow down, we must.
Only once we stop, we can see more.
Only once we pause, we can notice more.
Only once we rest, we can do more.
I talked to myself the most than I’ve ever been
What I have been most surprised to realise during this trip is how much I talked to myself. Not that I don’t normally do it, but I think being mostly alone for 7 days gives myself ample time to appreciate that I do self-talk a lot. Like A LOT. Whether it was narrating my experiences aloud or processing my thoughts and emotions internally. I scolded myself, I laughed to myself, and I found my mood varies depending on what I talked to myself that day.
Self talk is indeed powerful. Don’t trust me on this, but check this information from the Australian government. It is not just affecting our mental health, but also can directly impact our physical health.
This inner voice combines conscious thoughts with inbuilt beliefs and biases to create an internal monologue throughout the day — healthdirect.gov.au
It requires discipline to be mindful of this inner voice because otherwise, it is so easy to go into a downward spiral of negative thoughts all day long. I do meditation here and there, so I have been familiar with self-talk. But this solo trip definitely brings it to the next level.
I do not know if I will ever do a solo trip again. I think I will, though. It is not that I think solo is better than with friends and family, but it is just a different type of experience. It’s like asking which one you like more, apple juice or tom yum soup? They are just different categories.
